says it all

fun quests on the table @Ben's

a thankful heart

for a person who accepted my mistake
no matter how foolish it is

i have no idea how to show my gratitude
because rather than punishment ive got a lesson instead

promise i'll grow up!

追。赶。输。累

也许我不怕吃苦
但不能让我同一时间地感到一文不值。。。

人间地域
就是你很清楚明白
连死了算了
也解决不了烦恼

我真的崩溃了

哭着吃晚餐
用一个人不优雅的可怜
换回个释放和抱怨的空间
感到可悲。却满足，欣慰。

祈求上天给我解脱

P/S: 很庆幸这坎坷的路上有你
你不在
但我并不寂寞

coffee . love

对你的爱
像咖啡
从小就不明白妈怎么会爱上这杯饮料
一开始对它的印像，只有苦。
后来我却爱上了它的味道
浓浓的，香香的。闻一闻开始怀疑我的想法。它，真的是苦的吗？

爱咖啡的人，还记得你喝的第一杯咖啡吗？
是为了什么而喝的。
考试开夜车？
就纯粹试一试？
还是被你另一半影响？

我，在爱上咖啡之前。
没泡过一杯属于我自己的咖啡。
可能吗？
哈哈！
我都偷喝我妈的！
然后慢慢问她我可以喝一杯咖啡吗？ 她也就教我怎么泡它。
然后就无法自拔 ：）

到我遇见了你。
还记得你带我去那家咖啡馆，品尝杯上等的咖啡。也过了愉快的一天。
也曾经帮我在7-11泡那廉价的咖啡。亲手提给我，很贴心地加了两包半的糖。就因为我说两包不够而三包却太甜。
全都为了我。
然后，你竟然为我去学煮咖啡了！！

我不明白，我怎么会爱上咖啡，怎么会爱上你。
但我知道，那爱很单纯，值得让我继续：）

「表面上是苦，但如果你愿意，用另外一个角度去看它，它其实深深地隐藏着它的好。只被＂你＂看到。」

@ Brother Baba Budan, July2010.

学会珍惜

微笑地翻看着旧照片
好美
我怎么都忘了。。

而尽然在想像
若当时我们可以预测未来。牵着手，会是怎样。

事实，可是比想像复杂。

当时的你，我，只是个意外的邂逅。
=]

scary day

isn't scary anymore =D

i was so so so nervous okayy!!!
really cant handle disappointment anymore..

n i dont have to!

but this is wat i did during the noon (in denial)
was having my fren over to do facial while knowing that the result is out already.. haha!!
its supposed to be freaking pain..
but i can hardly feel it.. mind was off somewhere...

took this pict when Geri msg me n wish me luck

hahaha!

n when im ready to check results the accaglobal server went down..

sigh...

but so glad that i wasnt alone checking it when i receive it by mail

:) thanx, apple <3

instead, its a happy day!

給我.勇氣

終於作了這個決定 別人怎麼說我不理 只要你也一樣的肯定 

我願意

天涯海角都隨你去 

我知道一切不容易 

我的心

一直溫習說服自己 

最怕你忽然說要放棄

愛真的需要勇氣

來面對流言蜚語

只要你一個眼神肯定

我的愛就有意義

我們都需要勇氣

去相信會在一起

人潮擁擠我能感覺你

放在我手心裡

你的真心....

如果我的堅強任性

會不小心傷害了你 

你能不能溫柔提醒 

我雖然心太急　更害怕錯過你

i will remember this forever
that night you held my hand tight, n the walk on the foreign street.
i feel safe. i dont feel empty anymore...


then you asked me to sing you a song
n this song, i whisper to your ear.


愛.. 真的需要勇氣..  

oh.. we're too noob for that stuffs..

i dont normally blog about my hangouts with frens
especially normal weekend's get together..
but it was an abnormal wan last nite -____-

People: Sammie, Lekho, Me. with Simon n Vern join a lil while later
background scene: McD taipan

As usual talking nonsense n all.. laughing at Lekho sending highly inappropriate msg to the wrong Simon regarding to our hangout.. hahahha!
Vern was doing her japanese class homework.. last min sial........

Sammie:   my sis is going to Genting tonight......
Me:         lets go Genting too!
Lekho:    *looked at the time* hey its almost 12 edi
Simon:     i can drive
Vern:       .................... *still doing homework*
Sammie:  u can drive my car
Me:         yea we'll split the petrol money :D
Lekho:    guys.... u serious? -____-
Sammie: YEA!!! y not?? adventurous!!!!
Me:        yea!! lets go!! we're not old!!!
Simon:    u ok, i ok..

turn out we're not too old for this stuffs
but too stupid for this stuffs
-______-

first, non of us know the exact way to Genting.. haha!
second, the person who have GPS in his phone thought his GPS expired already
n we kept following the Ipoh way cuz we remember we saw Genting Highland signboard! (the last time we travel to Ipoh)
n then the person who have GPS know its supposed to be the Kuantan way but 3 girls sitting behind of the vehicle said 3 brains is better than 1 brain.. (stressssssS)

so, the Ipoh way is still correct
but its the freaking longer way n its the old road!!!!
n lack of signboards afterthat!!!!!!!!!!

2:00 am
we were driving to no where we find familiar
the last familiar place we knew was Hulu Yam
n it was a while ago already

2:15 am
*awkward silence*
lekho finally turn on his GPS
"ey.. we overshopped lar"
-_______-

between 2:15 to 3am
*tension*
scary DARK road n remember, dont look back!
cuz u wont be able to see anything behind!!!
lekho suggest, "eyy y not we turn off the light n see how that feels"
errr..... worst thing ever!
-______-


3am
reach Genting
all look like crap

to the casino!!!!!!!!
oh.. not really, toilet first.. hahaha!


5am
wL officially lose her voice -____- (sore throat)
Simon, Lekho n Sammie lose their money instead

5:30am
walk around Genting
everyone suggest breakfast!!!
dim sum!!!! back to USJ for that!! YEA!!!!

6 smtg
*quiet car* bunch of zombies
Sammie whisper to Simon, i guess no more breakfast.. we'll just go home..

HAHA!!

reach home 7 plus..
Sammie: "i wish our house r much nearer"
-_____-

1.1.11

what so special about new year?

the most recent eve that ive thrown myself being out of the house was christmas's eve
n trust me, i didnt enjoy at all no matter how hard ive tried
id rather be at home watching series n leave those hang outs to when we have more choices of where to go..
surprisingly i had a contradicting feeling just a few hours before i leap to year 2011
was that i felt lonely
i was at home alone before dear roberto W and alejandro Y pick me up after their dinner
i was wrong
lonely was an awful feeling no matter how much i love my alone time
im glad and consider myself lucky that ive havent been alone for going through all the hard time in year 2010

my fren sammie said her year 2010 was a roller coaster ride
so am i

a break up
a worst CNY ever
a further weight loss
a satisfying results
a better connection with my sister
a great holiday
a few dates not being the usual me
an all fail results
a bad complexion
a dramatic resignation after 2 weeks of employment -___-
a submission, admitting i need help
an OBU degree
a YGFW
an apple
a drive out alone


ppl call me lucky right now but im not!
because only a few out of the list up there was out of control n so i bliv year 2010 could turn out better if i try harder
its got good enough..


thats how i welcome my year 2011. :)

:)

have i changed?

maybe..

cuz people change everyday, n all the time.. but sometimes it is just not so noticable..

in the case of relationship..
currently i felt that im back to myself a few years ago..
back before i met my ex..
that girl who couldnt open her heart to anyone at all..
whenever things get serious, i bail...

except that now i understand more about loving someone..
n cant ignore the fact that when things turn ugly n u start to hate,
it'll be as deep as the love u've once given out.
plus, hurt.. it takes time to heal..

i realise i cant affort all that right now..

i've told few of my close friends that im surprise i could start seeing someone so soon
not in a relationship, but simply dating..
last sem.

n it didnt turn out as great as i thought it should be..
happy..
but too much to handle..

i have not lose my faith in love.
just not ready yet..
not willing to put myself in vulnerable condition anymore
n realise that i need to protect myself, by myself..

im back!

just had the best holiday ever for 3 weeks
n blog being abandoned for 3 weeks as well..

i thought i would've at least update it once or twice a week there but turn out i didnt have the time.. haha!
need not to explain..
y would i waste the time i have there in front of the PC?? =P

im lucky n glad that sam n her frens were all having winter break during my stay
or all the day trips will not happen =)
n less party or hangout definitely.. hehe..

n cant bliv that i didnt talk to my parents at all for that 3 weeks -____-
but i did try calling okayyyyy..
feel so bad when i receive the first call once i've landed
it was from my dad T_T
he remember exactly what time i reach Malaysia
eventhough it wasnt him who pick me up from the airport..

:)
home sweet home!
now i cant wait to get my results..

as at 6pm of 22nd June

my emotions took a roller coaster ride this few days
i wasnt prepared.
there're too many things didnt work out as planned.

but now im back!!!
suddenly i remember how much i've wanted this..

just 1 girl, 2 luggages, and 1 purple doggie leaving Malaysia with loads of fun ahead :)
3 weeks it is!
bubbyeee~~

y Is Earth Hour such a big deal?

a year already? mhm.. that was quick..
lemmi think wat i did on last year's Earth Hour..

in my room, full blast air-cond, with lights on n playing psp..
HAHAHAHAHA!

i kept telling myself "okok, a while more later i'll turn off the lights and air-cond"
...
but i didnt....
although they had my full support when i heard of the idea initially..

so what happen is that an hour was GONE before i wanna show my real support in action..
i think it kinda proof that the particuplar hour is not THAT important..
(lets skip the commercial or corporate point of view but only us, the insignificant as an individual but significant as hell as a group)
cuz did you take the initiative to recycle? take least plastic bags as possible/bring your own shopping bag?
or any other stuffs to protect the earth that you can ever think of but not only when ppl said so..
cuz power supply is just a part of it!


watch me! im still gonna on the freaking lights and air-cond later.. oh.. i mean NOW!

.......

alot of ppl told me that i should enjoy my college life..
but its wrong..
i shud appreciate it instead..

cuz how am i supposed to enjoy while my result is not as good as i deserve to :(


p/s: BUT im pretty sure i'll b able to enjoy my coming holiday... MUAHAHAHAHAH!

where this is is not a secret!